


there's something tragic about you

by butidontreallycare



Category: All For The Game - Nora Sakavic
Genre: Featuring, M/M, and then gets some news, and things change, badass bestfriends, domestic andreil, explores the foxes relationships with each other, hopefully for the better, i decided to do it, idk what im doing, ive been thinking about this for a very long time so, neil is about to graduate from palmetto, slight angst, soft andrew bc i love him, soft neil bc i love him too, they're a big mostly happy family alright, very soft foxes
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-27
Updated: 2018-10-08
Packaged: 2019-07-18 11:18:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,317
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16117304
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/butidontreallycare/pseuds/butidontreallycare
Summary: The Wesiniski line was supposed to have died with Nathaniel.It didn't.





	1. there's something wretched about this

**Author's Note:**

> look, i did a thing.

It happens when the song changes overhead, switching from a soft melodic ballad to something sharper, more rustic. Neil doesn’t know either of these songs, but Robin must because she starts mouthing along. When she begins singing softly, Neil looks up from his work book and catches her eyeing the counter of the small café they’re in. It’s one that Nicky discovered during Neil’s second year, a small cozy place called The Den. It quickly became the unofficial study spot for most of the Foxes. Today, it’s only Robin and Neil.

A big part of Neil aches for the days when it used to be more.

He blinks slowly and pushes the images (Dan and Matt working on their Econ papers like madmen, all red eyed and a few hours away from delirious. Renee sketching out her next project with the fancy pencils Andrew got her last Christmas. Alison chugging down her third cup of coffee because Aaron just downed his fourth, not that he notices anything other than his fifth practice-problem set for biology. Nicky quizzing Andrew on legal terms and cases for his midterm, sometimes in German but mostly in English. Andrew with his bruised knuckles folded around a steaming mug of something that’s more sugar than coffee, with the light in his hair and reflecting off his eyes, and Neil should be doing his translations but Andrew is much better to look at-) out of his head. Robin is sitting opposite him, her short dark hair pinned back with multi-colored hair clips and an empty mug just waiting for a refill. She steers her gaze back to her laptop, refocusing on the paper she doesn’t need to turn in for two weeks, and then Neil sees him. 

From their table in the corner, Neil sits facing the room while Robin has her back to it (and that’s only because Robin trusts Neil enough to look out for her). In the line at the front register is a familiar man wearing a dark suit and of Japanese descent. He doesn’t look out of place, not with his business attire and phone held up to his ear, but Neil can see the set of his shoulders and the way his eyes focus on the two Foxes. When the Moriyama lackey sees that he has Neil’s attention, he motions with a single finger towards the window. 

Outside, there is a black sedan parked by the entrance. Its windows are tinted dark enough that Neil cannot make out the outline of anyone inside. 

“Neil?” Robin’s voice suddenly registers in Neil’s head. She calls his name again, probably has been for some time judging by the concerned turn of her lips. “Is everything alright?” 

She looks worried and it’s a familiar expression on her face. Neil hasn’t been handing his final year at Palmetto all that well, and Robin has had to pull him out of his panicked thoughts a fair amount of times. She’s probably thinking that he’s falling into another pit of anxiety, and some part of Neil distantly wishes that were true. 

“I have to go.” Neil responds with a voice he cannot stop from shaking. Robin reacts immediately, body tensing into alertness. “I- Stay here. I have to go alone.”

“Go where?” She hisses, reaching out to pinch the sleeve of his sweater when he stands. “Neil. Go where?” 

Neil wants to get angry, wants to use biting words to ask the world, _Why now? What does he want of me now?_ But he doesn’t, because Robin is simply unlucky enough to be with him when Ichirou calls. 

“Call Andrew.” Neil says instead of screaming. “And don’t let him do anything stupid.” 

Robin isn’t allowed the chance to question him because Neil slips out of her grip and heads for the exit. He takes none of his things and feels momentarily guilty that Robin will have to take everything back to the dorm on her own, but then he carefully pushes all of that away. He forces his mind to let go of the distress in Robin’s eyes as he stepped past her, of the call he was supposed to have with Andrew in a few hours, of the dinner he was meant to have with his team. All of that is reeled in and locked away in a box, leaving only the bones of Nathaniel in their absence. 

 

***

After Andrew and the rest of his lot graduated the previous year, Neil had fallen into something of a spiral. That summer was a hard one, half because Andrew (and Kevin and even Aaron) were moving on with their lives after college, and half because Neil was about to be alone for his _last year at Palmetto_. Things were happening, were changing and Neil couldn’t help but feel like he was being dragged along, pinned beneath the undercarriage. 

Neil found peace in thinking of the life he could have after his own graduation, which was a difficult thing to do because Neil had never been allowed the luxury of a future. The harsh hands of his mother and, before that, the violence that made up his father kept him rooted to the present and nothing else. Thinking beyond that led only to pain. It’d been foolish to think of what he could have because people like Neil were not allowed anything beyond death. 

And then Neil became a Fox, and the whole world was transfigured. Suddenly, Neil had a chance at a future with the people he loved doing the thing that he loved until his body gave out. Sure, he would have to live with the constant threat of the Moriyama’s hanging over his head but that was like second nature to him. He’d lived his whole life with some threat biting at his heels, pressing him forward. The yakuza keeping tabs on his Exy career was an upgrade. He could live like that and, holy hell, he wanted to. He really wanted a lifetime of playing exy with Andrew and Kevin, with Matt and Allison and Dan, with Robin and Nicky and Renee and Aaron in the stands, with Wymack and Abby just a call away. 

He would crack the Earth open and remake it just so he could have that. Sitting in the back of an empty sedan with a one way plane ticket to Virginia, Neil is suddenly afraid he’ll have to.

***

Neil lands a few torturous hours later, body rigid with anxiety. As he walks down the tarmac, following the shadow of another lackey in a dark suit and stoney structure, Neil forces his limbs to relax. He needs to remain composed. Nathaniel would not fidget. He’d been taught better.

There is another black sedan, but this one is occupied. There is no Ichirou, but another man that also looks familiar. They are probably the ones that accompanied his Lord during their last rendezvous. He sits besides Neil, steel faced and silent. Neil lets the ghost of Nathaniel morph his posture into something more relaxed. He keeps the warmth of his Foxes in his center, but lets everything else solidify like ice. 

The drive isn’t a long one. Neil commits all their movements to memory (forwards for five minutes, right turn, forward for fifteen, right turn again, forward for seven and then a left turn and then forwards for two minutes) and then they’re stopping. Neil steps out when the other man does, and finds himself in the parking lot of a hotel. A Ritz-Carlton that shines brightly in the night sky and is not at all what Neil expected. 

Silently, in the dark corner of his mind where fear had been locked away, Neil begins to recall all the dirty kinds of business his father conducted in fancy hotels just like this one. He forces away the tremble that threatens to travel down his spine and shake Nathaniel loose.

Neil follows Ichirou’s men into the lobby and then into the elevator. The woman at the front desk does not look up even once. The man in the staff uniform waiting besides the elevator looks right through Neil like he isn’t there at all. The titanium doors slide open but the man makes no move to enter. Instead, he looks down and does not even breathe. 

Neil and the men that bracket him step on and ride it slowly to the top. The 23rd floor is empty when the doors ding open, save for a few men in suits that Neil can tell are armed and very dangerous. Still, he marches down the dimly lit hallway like he does this every night, like he hasn’t a single concern. The suite, when they enter it, is colored a deep, violent red. 

Neil wonders briefly if he’s about to die.

Ichirou is sat in a small lounge just beyond the entrance hall, and he is not alone. The man that accompanied Neil guides him to the couch before Ichirou, and then leaves the room. Neil takes a seat and spares a thought for his knit blue sweater and stained sweats and how … civilian they must look. Ichirou is dressed in a pressed blue suit with a soft pink tie and sandy brown shoes. Neil can’t tell what the girl sitting just out of his line of sight is wearing. He thinks it’s something black.

“Good evening, My Lord.” Neil says a short moment after the door clicks shut, because he is expected to. 

Ichirou does not respond. He stares at Neil with a look the smaller man cannot decipher. They stay like this, frozen and, on Neil’s part (not that anyone can tell), unsure, for some immeasurable amount of time. Eventually, Ichirou shifts in his seat and reaches over the side of the velvet settee. Neil ignore every instinct within him that screams for him to brace, to prepare for the worst because if Ichirou wants him dead, there is nothing Neil can do to prevent it. 

Fortunately, Ichirou merely pulls out a thick manila folder and holds it in his hands. 

“I am a man of my word.” He says as he flips the folder open with hands that can only be precise. Though Ichirou speaks to the room at large, Neil knows that he is not the one being addressed. “In here is everything you’ll need, provided that Nathaniel agrees to our conditions.” 

Without making a sound, the girl steps out of the shadows and moves to stand behind Ichirou. Neil’s hackles rise at the predatory shape of her body, and he knows that she is dangerous before he can even decide if he should chance a glance. 

He feels unbalanced and apprehensive, confused as to what he should make of this situation. What kind of deal could Ichirou have struck with a girl that is notably smaller and therefore younger than Neil? Why does it concern him? What are their conditions? 

“Nathaniel.” Ichirou says after the girl has retreated back to the shadows. The Moriyama boss looks up as he snaps the folder close, and his dark eyes finally land on Neil. “I would like to introduce you to Norra. Norra, meet Nathaniel.” 

Norra is small. That’s the first thing Neil notices. She’s small and young and looks a lot like - 

“Your father was an unfaithful man, but we elected to forgive him after Norra proved her worth. She’s a bastard, yes, but she’s been of great value.” 

She looks a lot like Neil. 

Norra looks at Neil and the icy blueness of her eyes freezes Neil in place. She doesn’t have freckles the way Neil does (or the way Nathan did), but she does have a small mole at the corner of her left eye that looks like a teardrop. Neil focuses on that and pretends that the Earth did not just upend itself. 

“When we were both younger,” Ichirou continues, and Neil isn’t sure what all he’s missed but he nods to show that he’s listening, “we came to an agreement. I failed to keep my end, so now Norra is free from keeping hers.”

Norra blinks and shifts, and Neil looks back to Ichirou. The young Japanese man looks - reserved. It sends another shock through Neil’s system. 

“Her bloodline, illegitimate as it may be, makes her a Moriyama asset. I’m sure you understand, Nathaniel, that we can’t just cut ties with her.” 

And like that, like a bolt of lightning or the catch of a match, Neil understands why he’s here. Norra knows too much to be let loose on the world, but has somehow muscled herself out of her chains. That doesn’t mean she doesn’t have a leash. Neil is here to decide who gets the other end of that leash. Norra will go to Neil or to whoever else is willing to take her. 

Knowing what he does, Neil understands that anyone willing to take in a Moriyama asset will not be kind. 

Norra remains in the shadow, seemingly unbothered by the ongoing discussion of her freedom. Her face is vacant, and her eyes glued to something beyond the windows of the suite. She has her back pressed agaisnt the wall and several weapons on her person. She’s still and quiet and very hard to look away from. 

Something in the emptiness of her expression reminds Neil of Andrew. 

“She’ll be under your custody until she comes of age. My men in the FBI have put in the paperwork, and once she’s 18, Norra will belong to the government. My branch of the government.” Neil feels like the words are coming to him through water, but he gets the gist of it. “I will be in your debt, Nathaniel. If you agree, of course.” 

The silent that comes after that could have lasted for a minute, an hour, a decade. Neil isn’t sure. All he knows is that, eventually, he says, “I do.”


	2. i’ll tell you my sins

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> a late night in a hotel kitchen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> !!!!! this is not proofread at all, so sorry for all the mistakes, especially since i wrote 80% of this on my phone :) i’m a mess lol anyways, i hope u enjoy this!! i hate writing dialogue bc idk how to people but wesninski children don’t know how to people either so ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯ 
> 
> i hope this chapter is a good time for y’all

That night, after hours of discussing the legalities of getting custody of someone that doesn’t really exist, Neil lies awake in bed, vigilant in a way he hasn’t been in years. Because he has a sister, a half-sister, who took his place and served under the Moriyamas after Mary took him and ran. Neil doesn’t know what she did for them but there is a hollowness to her that says enough. He has no reason to feel guilty about that, but he does anyways. 

Tomorrow morning, Neil will go down to a legal court and sign the documents that will grant him full custody of Norra. He has no idea what to do after that. Probably get back to Palmetto. Call Andrew and let him now that everything is alright. Mostly alright. 

And take Norra with him. Somehow. 

From the other side of the suite, the part that Norra had retreated to as soon as she the pair of them had entered sometime after two, there is only silence. During the discussion with Ichirou, Norra had said no more than two words. Neil had tried to not look at her, too unsteady in his center to stare down those icy blues and the many other familiar features. He’d only had a glance, but Neil had seen that Nathan’s genes were strong, both in himself and his sister (his sister, he has a sister that he will have legal guardianship of in less than twelve hours despite the fact that Neil still struggles with looking after himself). 

The notable difference between Neil and Norra is that Norra has dark black hair. Everything else, from the set of her brows to the curve of her chin looks like it’s been taken directly off Neil’s face and made softer, younger. It’s unsettling. 

The whole situation is unsettling. It’s completely bizarre, actually. Neil’s life has never been easy, but he wholly thinks this is completely uncalled for. Neil feels horribly unbalanced and can only try helplessly to not want desperately for the solid shape of Andrew and his strength. 

After another half hour of sitting up in his bed, straining his ears to catch any sound from the other end of the suite, Neil gives up on sleeping entirely. He tosses the stark white sheets off his body and quietly shuffles out into the hall and heads towards the kitchen.

Neil finds that he is not surprised to see Norra sitting at the table, hands folded over her chest and empty eyes glistening in the glow of the laptop open in front of her. Neil pauses in the entranceway only long enough to note that Norra is still in the same black athletic pants and t-shirt from earlier that night, and then sets about preparing a cup of coffee. 

When the coffee machine starts growling and the smell of coffee fills the room, Neil turns around and leans the base of his spine against the countertop. Norra ignores him and continues staring at the computer scream. Her posture is coiled, like she’s ready to jump to her feet at a moments notice. It’s too dark for Neil to see if she’s still armed, but he fully expects her to be. 

Neil needs to say something, he’s sure, because this silence is nothing like the silences between him and Andrew. Those are almost serene, comfortable. This is taught, like it’ll snap and break everything it hits. 

Surprisingly, Norra breaks the silence first. She tucks a single knee under her chin and spins the laptop around so Neil can see the screen. The browser is opened to an image of Neil, Andrew and Kevin at last year’s championship game. It was taken by a fan after they had won for the third time in three years. Kevin is smiling, eyes lit up as he looks to Coach Womack who’s standing out of frame, and he has an arm wrapped around Neil’s shoulders. Neil himself is staring at Andrew with a sharp, pleased smile on his face that’s mostly blocked by his helmet and the hand Andrew has tangled in the mesh of it. Andrew’s face is as stoic as usual, but Neil can remember the glimmer in those golden brown eyes that showed how satisfied Andrew was with shutting out the goal for the last quarter and a half. 

Norra’s voice pulls him out of his memories like a hiss of air through smoke. “The blonde one.” She says, and there’s some kind of accent to her vowels that makes Neil think of his mother. “Is he dangerous.” 

It’s strange, the way Norra’s inflection is as toneless as Andrew’s, but it’s a good strange. A comforting strange because it settles Neil down by the way it reminds him of Andrew and his blunt way of communicating. Norra preferring to get straight to the point is something Neil has a lot of practice in dealing with. 

“Sometimes.” Neil responds carefully as he pours his coffee into a paper cup. “Only when provoked.” 

Norra takes that in silently, spinning her laptop back around and closing it. With the blueish light of the screen no longer illuminating her, Norra looks very young. It startles Neil enough to make the coffee traveling down his throat taste more like lead. 

He doesn’t even know how old she is. 

“You graduate in May. Where will you go after.” 

Norra rests her chin on top of her bent knee and looks at Neil with round, unblinking eyes. He can’t read anything from her expression, from the set of her body. 

“I’m set to sign with the Seattle Seahawks later this month, but the season doesn’t start until fall.” Neil can’t help the thrill that runs through his veins at the thought of his new team, the same team that had signed Andrew just a few weeks previously. “We’ll be staying in Columbia until I can find a place to rent.” 

“You say ‘we’ like you plan on keeping me with you.” Norra says after a moment, and Neil sees where this is going. 

He chooses his words carefully, knowing that each one carried a weight that could not be overlooked. “If you want to stay with me, you can; that’s the agreement. But if you want to go, I’ll look the other way.” 

“That’s quite bold of you to say after making an agreement with Lord Moriyama to border me.Are you so reckless that you’d willing defy him?” Norra sits forward, dropping her knee and straightening her spine. Immediately, she is several times more intimidating. 

This feels, to Neil, like a test, like he’s being measured and judged. The results will probably determine whether Norra will stay with her brother or not. 

Neil decides then to be as true as he can be. With all the conviction he can feel after living a life of pain and running and still never getting away, he says, “I don’t plan on making you do things you don’t want to do.” 

Norra tilts her head and dark curls fall into her eyes. “You could never make me do anything.” 

“Good.” Neil shrugs. “Then we don’t have to worry about that.” 

“I don’t know if you’re naive or just stupid.” She mutters as she leans back and lets some of the tension out of her body. 

“Probably stupid.” Neil admits quietly mostly to himself, Andrew’s particular flavor of affection flooding his mind. “But I’ve been told I have a problem with authority.” 

Norra doesn’t deign that with a response. Instead, she slips out of the chair and motions Neil aside so she can pour herself a cup of coffee. Neil moves to the small fridge on the other side of the kitchen, still not sure enough of Norra to let her in close proximity. She doesn’t seem to mind or even notice, too busy with adding a single pink packet of sugar to her cup. Neil pulls out an energy bar and makes quick work of devouring it. 

“Columbia.” Norra says suddenly. “What is there.” 

“A house.” Neil says around a mouthful. “It belongs to Nicky Hemmick. He’s an-”

“I know who he is.” Norra cuts in. “He is in Germany now.” She says it with finality. Neil is not surprised that she knows this. If anything, he’s strangely touched that she’s done her research. It makes him feel - closer to her? Like they have something in common at least, since Neil is a big fan of knowing what he’s going to get himself into. 

This having a secret sibling business is difficult. How did Andrew manage it? (The squishy and soft part of Neil that’s been slowly blooming since he was taken in by the Foxes thinks Andrew is simply stronger than most in this way).

“Andrew Minyard. He is something to you.” Norra says, only this time Neil can hear the question behind it. 

And the question throws him off. Not even this year’s or last year’s batch of freshman had figured out that Andrew and Neil were a thing. Neil cannot recall ever seeing Norra before, so he can’t completely understand how it is that she knows something that people who have lived with and witnessed first hand could not see. 

Taking his silence as surprise, Norra adds, “It is my job to see the things people don’t want me to see.”

And that - that’s a little alarming. And confusing? 

“Your job?” Neil echoes. Norra doesn’t elect to respond so Neil doesn’t answer her question. Equal trade is something he is unwilling to forgo for anyone. 

The night continues to pass and Neil and Norra finish their respective cups of coffee. The microwave’s digital clock reads 4:12 when Norra gets to her feet with her laptop tucked against her hip. She looks at Neil and Neil let’s her see. 

It’s amazing that he can do that now. That he can watch the city blink against the backdrop of the night sky and feel a virtual stranger’s (who is somehow not a stranger at all) eyes dissecting him and not even flinch. 

It’s a testament to how much Neil has settled into this softer version of himself that he can allow himself to want Norra to find what’s she’s looking for in him. He sees a lot of who he was before the Foxes in his sister. He sees a lot of Andrew, too. 

“I was born in Italy.” Norra confesses faintly, her voice soft enough that Neil almost misses it. When he looks over at her, he sees that her eyes are clear and focused on his. “I lived there until I was six. Ichirou sent me to Japan where I learned how to kill men. I will defend myself violently. It’s what I know. Don’t expect anything from me; there is nothing I can give you.” 

For the first time since he met her, Neil sees emotion in Norra’s face. It’s just a flicker, a defiant clench of her jaw and a wildness in the icy swirls of her eyes. It makes his heart clench. 

A truth for a truth. It is the only way Neil cares to know people. Norra would not be an exception. 

“I won’t expect anything.” He says plainly. “You’re going to be staying with me. It’s up to you to decide what that means.” 

Norra stands by the doorway leading to her room. Neil watches the way she breathes deeply, calmingly, and then forces the tension out of her shoulders and her fingertips. She stands eerily still, and Neil realizes that she’s afraid. 

It makes him feel sick. He’d only ever been afraid of his father. 

“Goodnight.” She bids him finally, not waiting for a response before she pivots and retreats again to her room. Neil waits to hear the lock click before he does the same. 

The desire to hear Andrew’s voice hits him like a tidal wave as soon as Neil’s head hits the pillow. Too tired to keep himself afloat, Neil sinks fitfully into sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> !! hello again, if u enjoyed this chapter pls leave me some comments and kudos! they make me really happy and encourage me to be proactive and other crazy things! share ur thoughts pls, but be kind i am delicate and fragile in the heart

**Author's Note:**

> lol hi i dont know what im doing and i dont know if im going to make this an actual thing. its been in my drafts for some time and i guess i want to know if anyone wants more? i guess i'd be down though, warning! my updating will probably be shit


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